The Rotten Adventures of Fred and George
by PatrioticSwellow
Summary: Read to you by the original PatrioticSwellow. Fred and George have an adventure over the course of several years at Hogwarts. Contains terrors beyond your wildest dreams. All because of Peeves.
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! PatrioticSwellow is on in the Harp...Sorry. HARRY POTTER series fanfiction now! Please note that this was written two years ago, and believe me, things can change drastically over two years. This was originally written to be funny, and it kinda is...But not really. There will be a good part involving Peeves the poltergeist that I really enjoyed writing. Hope you like it!

 **Other written works by PatrioticSwellow on:**

 **Pokemon**

 **Leven Thumps**

 **Michael Vey**

 **Pokemon X Leven Thumps**

* * *

PROLOGUE

"Don't be thick, Filtch will catch us!" George called down the corridor.

"Fine," Fred said, "But I'm still positive that we can get away with dropping dungbombs!"

George shook his head as they walked to Defence Against the Dark Arts.

"Haven't dungbombs gotten a little old? Zonko's shop sells stuff for trouble maker wannabes."

Fred thought for a moment.

"You have a point," he said. They thought all through class, sucking on sugar-flavored quills.

CHAPTER 1

The next day started on a short boring drag. Sure, they dropped dungbombs here and there, but nothing truly out of the ordinary happened. Well, one cool thing did "shake it up a little". As they were happily spreading entropy throughout the castle, Filch caught them.

Defence Against the Dark Arts was more fun than usual for the Weasley Twins. They had one of the most amazing objects that has ever been created within Hogwarts. The Marauder's Map. Fred and George were now unstoppable troublemakers. The school would never find out how the twins could appear and disappear so quickly, until a select few learned a few years later...

 **I know that this was shorter than short. But I'm just copying what was in my composition notebook, with almost no alterations whatsoever. Whatever.**

 **-PatrioticSwellow**


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2  
SECOND YEAR AT HOGWARTS

The new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was someone that the twins could really pick on. He was stupid. People told the twins that professor Quirrel was driven to near-insanity when he encountered a very evil vampire in a foreign country. One december day, Fred and George bewitched a few snowballs to attack the professor wherever he went. They talked about him when he wasn't (and was) listening. Quirrel deserved the Weasley's treatment. He had lord Voldemort living on the back of his head.

 **Hey guys. This was just a filler chapter. Don't read it if you want to avoid the cotton candy (that tastes like nothing) in the fic.**

 **-PatrioticSwellow**

 **P.S. READ "The Truth Revealed". You won't regret it (Unless you aren't a Pokemon fan. But hey, those who don't like Pokemon are the people who have never played it.). Wow, I just made the A/N longer than the chapter! Oh well. Peeves is coming up soon. He shares the same personality as Harpy. If you don't know who Harpy is, then disregard this comment.**


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

THIRD YEAR AT HOGWARTS

It was summer vacation for all of the Hogwarts students. As usual, Mrs. Weasley had the twins de-nome the garden every morning. And as usual, Ron and the twins complained that they couldn't use magic and curse all of those pesky nomes out.

Ron and the twins reluctantly walked out the front door, not prepared for another day of hard labor. They always muttered about cruelty whenever she spoke about Gildroy Lockheart in front of Dad. She always read his book-"A guide to Household Pests"- to the twins every single morning, a long boring 300 page read.

This morning was different, though. Something important was about to happen, and Fred could smell it in the air as he tossed a nome forty-five feet over the fence. Someone (or something) was watching him. Fred looked about. The sun was bright, the trees green, and the grass yellow and overgrown... No one was visibly near him. Ron and George were on the other side of the yard, tossing nomes.

At last, he spotted two tennis ball sized eyes stare at him from a thorny bush. Fred looked on as the house-elf emerged. His first thought was: _At last someone who can do all of my chores,_ but then he realized that this elf still had a master. He wore an overlarge tattered pillowcase that looked as if a huge glass of butterbeer had been spilled on it.

"Hello!" Dobby said, "How are you?"

Fred didn't know how to respond. He had never spoken to a house-elf before in his life. The Weasleys were too poor. Only wizards who owned money had these creatures to aid them, like the Malfoys.

"Hi," Fred said, feeling rather stupid. "What's your name?"

The elf made a low bow.

"Dobby the house-elf at your service."

"Hey Dobby. What's up?"

"I am the house-elf of the Malfoys-"

"You little niblet is from _where?"_ Fred was beginning to feel a little angry at the elf for bothering him in the first place. Dobby backed away in alarm.

"Dobby is a very bad house-elf," he moaned, grabbing a stick out of the grass and whacking himself in the face with it.

"BAD DOBBY! BAD DOBBY! YOU'RE A VERY BAD-"

Fred took the stick, silencing the poor creature.

"Clearly, you can't be trusted with anything sharp," he said as he threw the stick (and a couple of nomes) over the fence.

"But Dobby had to be punished, sir."

"How is that, other than the fact that you almost beat yourself to death?" asked Fred.

"Dobby did not come on his master's orders, sir," said Dobby.

"Dobby only wants Harpy Harry Potter to be safe."

Fred eyed Dobby suspiciously, hoping that Draco didn't have anything to do with this. _Interesting._

"What do you want me to do?"

"Make sure that Harry Potter never comes to your house, sir. If he comes, then he may want to go back to Hogwarts even more than ever."

"And how do I know that you're not-" CRACK "-lying?"

Dobby was gone.

Ron and George surprisingly didn't notice any activity on the other side the entire time. They were probably too busy with the pests to notice anything. It shocked Fred that an elf would apperate in just to make sure that Harry didn't visit.

 **You're welcome for the chapter over 500 words. LOL.**

 **-PatrioticSwellow**


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

FOURTH YEAR AT HOGWARTS

Fred didn't have to tell George or Ron about Dobby's visit. They had to save Harry from Vernon's siege on his room. Of course, they wrote to him, but he never answered any of them.

 _It must have something to do with that house-elf,_ Fred thought darkly. For some reason, he couldn't bring himself to telling George or Ron about his encounter in the back yard.

That night, Fred, George, and Ron took their dad's car and navigated all the way to the Dursleys. Everything turned out alright. They had a real giggle. The return to the burrow was a completely different story though. What a time they had encountering an upset Mrs. Weasley.

 **Once again, the PatrioticSwellow is reminding you that this came directly from my composition notebook at school. I was bored okay? Another reminder that this was written a trillion years ago.**

 **Hope you enjoyed this short read! Feel free to point out grammar errors if you really really need to. I won't be reading them.**

 **-PatrioticSwellow**


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

The Weasley twins could tell that Harry really needed the Marauder's Map even more than they did. George knew that they needed to corner Harry all by himself to hand the artifact over.

"We need to catch him by himself, but he's always with Ron and that Granger girl," George complained.

"Patience George," Fred said. "We'll figure it out before their next visit to Hogsmeade. In the meantime, I'd fancy a game of exploding snap."

The weasley twins knew by now that Harry somehow had this ability to turn invisible, so they watched the map. At last, the day of the Hogsmeade visit came, and Harry was left all by himself.

 **All right, guys. This is a "chapter" that I just submitted. No problema.**

 **-PatrioticSwellow**


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER 6

The day of the Triwizard Tournament had finally arrived.

"A thousand galleons! Think of it, a thousand galleons!" George sniffed as he loaded bacon onto his morning dish.

"We are too young to play in the games!" said Fred. "Dumbledore sut up an age line."

They thought all through breakfast on how they could somehow breach the rules just a little bit.

It took them four class periods to finally discover a way to get across the line. Now, they had to endure professor Grubblyplank's Care of Magical Creatures lesson.

"I have it!" George whispered.

"What?" Fred rasped as he shoveled dirt. "Well, spit it out then!"

"We'll drink an aging potion. We only need to be a few months older to cross the line. I think that drinking the potion will make up the difference just enough for the line."

"I had already thought about that," Fred snapped, "but this is Dumbledore's line that we are talking about. The idea is way too dim-witted."

"No!" George whispered back. "That's the point! It's so dim-witted that even Dumbledore wouldn't think that anyone would try it. Trust me, we'll get through the line."

"Fine, but it better work," Fred groaned.

* * *

Hogwarts didn't see it coming (but of course, it never does). There was a huge uproar at breakfast. Fred and George paraded up the dining hall, all ready for the attempt. The students cheered. In the twins' fists were two vials of potion.

"Ready Fred?"

"Ready George."

They clinked their glasses for good luck, then stepped through. Nothing reacted. The crowd went wild.

"YES!"

They were victorious at last. The age of the twins had begun. If only they coud've seen Dumbledore's face, watching them from the staff table.

 **Don't worry, there will be original ideas in this fanfic. We are getting close to the best part!**

 **-PatrioticSwellow**


End file.
